10 signs the singularity has arrived

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TheWanderingJewels TheWanderingJewels's picture
10 signs the singularity has arrived

10) You're late to work because can't remember where you left the encryption keys to your backup consciousness cache.

9) TV watches you more than you watch it.

8) Your divorce proceedings include nasty fight over who owns the source code to your wife's operating system.

7) Your cats have higher incomes and several more advanced degrees than you. Occasionally, they let you pet them while they do differential calculus (they think you're so cute when you do that).

6) You're evicted from your body, which is seized by the county and sold for back taxes.

5) More computers own people than people own computers. Video game violence takes on an entirely new meaning.

4) Civilization collapses and rebuilds itself several times during your daily commute to work. This generally causes you only a slight delay.

3) Political analysts are surprised when third-party AI candidate is elected President with 99.99999% of the vote as several trillion voters are created minutes before polls close.

2) Goldfish crackers beg you for mercy, try to wriggle away, then scream when you bite into them. Your kids love this.

1) "Blue Screen of Death" no longer just a figure of speech.

A brave little theory, and actually quite coherent for a system of five or seven dimensions--if only we lived in one.

Academician Prokhor Zakharov
"Now We Are Alone"