August 16 - Rules Primer - Feedback Thread

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APixelShort APixelShort's picture
August 16 - Rules Primer - Feedback Thread

Okay, so a lot of this is "personal taste" feedback, but there are a couple of typos as well.

Typos:
Making Tests Table, second last bullet reads: "If you do not have the appropriate skil, you may...", where it should say "the appropriate skill"

Second page, under the Refreshing Pools heading:
"...long recharge completely restores your pools to their full valu"
should read "...pools to their full value."

Feedback to taste:

Under the Opposed Tests heading, "rolling d100 against skill", I feel should read "a skill" or "the skill" to flow better. Personal taste.

Using Flex, Defining Relationship:
"This connection should be more loose or minor than close or serious." doesn't flow. "This connection should be loosely defined, and shouldn't be considered close or serious." is the best my brain can come up with on my lunch break, but even that feels strange. Not sure how to improve it, but I feel like it can be? Again, I think this might be a personal taste thing.

Combat breakout:
"Combat is an opposed test." could read "Combat is always an opposed test", given combat is not itself the name of the test (melee/guns/psi are all used in combat, as are other offensive actions), but this may be personal taste.

Hacking breakout:
"When hacking a target, there are two methods you can go about it:" feels to me like it should read something like "there are two methods available to you", or "two ways to go about it". This is personal taste.

Last point: "...need to make tests for actions your privileges allow" feels like it should read. "...for any actions your privileges allow".

That's what I've got so far, but this is otherwise an extremely useful resource that I'll be giving to a new player in the next fortnight, so I'll get their feedback as well once they've played a session or two.

APS Corp — Making Nonsense Since 2013